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In Business Writing, Give Your Readers a Break: Pick One!

September 24, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

by Barbara McNichol

business writingIn wanting to cover many aspects of a topic, business writers sometimes throw down so many variables that readers have no way to gauge the importance of each. They feel weighed down trying!

Look at these examples in business writing:

  1. The professor included and provided a methodology for continuing the effort.
  2. The state and local leaders developed and drafted numerous statutes.
  3. We need to appreciate and understand the factors affecting the time and place.

The “Pick One” Principle

You can lighten your readers’ load by applying the “pick one” principle. You’ll find it works for all kinds of business writing—emails, reports, manuscripts, and more.

The “pick one” principle asks: “Which word better describes what you want to say—the word before or after the and?” Then pick the one that adds more emphasis and accuracy to your meaning.

In Example 1, which word better conveys the meaning—included or provided? In this context, provided can cover the meaning for both—that is, if something is provided, we can assume it’s included. Pick one: provided.

The professor provided a methodology for continuing the effort.

Example 2 has the word and in two places, making the sentence long-winded. For developed and drafted, the more apt word is drafted because something can’t be drafted without being developed first. Pick one: drafted.

“Pick one” also applies to making a single-word substitution. For example, state and local could be changed to government without altering the meaning in this context.

The government leaders drafted numerous statutes.

In Example 3, because appreciate and understand are so close in meaning, using both is like saying it twice. “Pick one” to streamline the writing. For time and place, we could substitute a single word: situation.

We need to understand the factors affecting the situation.

Rule of Thumb in Business Writing

When you reread anything you’ve written, find all the places you’ve used and, then apply the “pick one” principle wherever possible. That way, you won’t dilute the meaning of your message or needlessly weigh down your readers.

Give them a break. Pick one!

better writing coverWant more tips like this to hone your writing skills? You’ll find 18 Days to Become a Better Writer an easy-to-use e-guide. Start your journey today by clicking here. Use code 18DAYS at checkout for a discount.

 

Share examples of “pick one” from your own writing here.

Filed Under: Business Writing Tagged With: better writing, business writing, clear writing, correct writing, nonfction book editing, nonfiction authors, nonfiction book editor

Celebrate World Gratitude Day This September 21st

September 17, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

gratitude dayIn the ’60s, a movement started to encourage people to share in conscious expressions of Gratitude on one day of the year. World Gratitude Day was born. How can you celebrate World Gratitude Day this September 21st?

I suggest setting aside time to express appreciation for your family, your community, your friends, your business associates, and anyone or anything that makes your life better—even animals and technologies.

Express gratitude to people who source, prepare, and serve your food and deliver your mail. Thank community leaders and employees who imagined, built, and continue to provide the systems that serve you. Thank those customers who put money in your pocket so you can live well. What would you add that’s specific to your life?

I am grateful for opportunities to spread light, love, and kindness every day. And I’m especially grateful to you for allowing me to help you make your dreams stronger through better writing.

Happy Gratitude Day.

P.S. Don’t forget to celebrate National Punctuation Day on September 24th!

Filed Under: Compelling Special Tagged With: authors and editors, better writing, gratitude day, nonficiton books, nonfiction book editor

Send Fewer Emails to Engage Deeper—and Lighten Your Load

September 4, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

fewer emails

by Dianna Booher (reprinted with permission)

Tim, a friend of mine back in college, had the weird habit of setting his alarm to go off at 7:00 am on Saturdays when he had no intention of getting out of bed early. “Why?” I asked him one day when we were complaining about studying late for exams and getting up early for class during the week.

“Oh, I don’t get up at 7:00! I just love the feeling of slapping off the alarm and knowing that I can roll over and go back to sleep for another 3 hours.”

Often, during the last three decades as I’ve coached, consulted, trained, and keynoted throughout organizations across myriad industries, I hear a similar sentiment. It’s just worded a little differently: “That department sends so much paperwork and nags us for so much information. It feels good just to ignore them.”

You have an essential mission, of course. And certainly you need to recruit, develop, and retain top talent to accomplish your goals. That involves educating your team about budget, resources, regulations, and compliance matters. Yet it’s not uncommon to hear complaints like these:

  • “They’re nonresponsive; they move too slowly.”
  • “Getting pre-approval just muddies the water.”
  • “They’ll tie your hands. They’re not risk-takers. It’s easier to ask forgiveness than permission.”

Could better—but fewer—emails close the gap between those negative perceptions and your essential mission?

Stated another way: Do you say too much, . . . about too little, . . .  too often? And does this habit bury critical communication your team needs to hear?

The Stats About Overload

Wherever we go, most of us are still tapping away. At the airport. At the gym. At the beach. From a hospital bed. At sunrise. Over lunch. During dinner. Chances are, email habits drain you and your employees, both mentally and emotionally. That spells lost productivity for your organization, stress for you and them, and ultimately the need to tune out periodically.

We were told more than two decades ago that email would revolutionize the way we work and save us an enormous amount of time. While email has many benefits, it has also engulfed us and created other productivity drains.

My organization, Booher Research Institute, recently commissioned a survey of email communication habits and productivity from the Social Research Lab at the University of Northern Colorado. Here’s what a representative sampling of knowledge workers across multiple industries reported about their email habits:

–42 percent spend 3 hours or more per day reading and writing email

–55 percent check email either hourly or multiple times per hour

–34 percent say the email they get is redundant (meaning they receive duplicate copies) or irrelevant to their needs

Send Fewer Emails to Get Quicker Action

When you send multiple emails regarding the same issue (reminders and follow-ups), people start to tune out—to that specific message and others you send. In essence, you are “training” readers to ignore “first editions.” As with those who hit the snooze button on their alarm clocks  multiple times, people become accustomed to ignoring required action until they get several email reminders.

Many conference planners have communicated through this typical “cycle” and learned this principle the hard way. For example, their annual convention ends in August. They began sending periodic emails: “Sign up now for next year to get a big discount.” Then to speakers, they start a different email series: “Propose to speak.” Then, it’s “The proposal deadline is coming.” Then, “The deadline is about to close.” Then, “We’re extending the deadline to give you longer to propose.”

Then the next series starts: “Submit your materials by X date. Then, “This is a reminder to submit your materials by X date.” Then, “This is your last reminder to submit your materials by X date.” Then, “We’re extending the submission deadline.”  Then, “We’ve changed the date for you to submit materials to give you adequate time. The new date is Y.”

You get the idea. Such communication habits sound like a parent’s saying to the four-year-old, “This is the last time I’m going to tell you this last time to pick up your toys.”

Lighten your load and stress: Don’t train your employees to ignore you.

 Engage Fewer People to Get More Responses

Culling your distribution lists for emails you send will likely increase engagement on important projects. As with meetings, the larger the group, the lower the individual participation. When you’re emailing a group for input (for example, a group of engineers about their training needs for the new year), the same principle applies: When you copy a large list, people feel anonymous, and fewer feel obligated to respond.

If you want/need input, cut your list, and you’ll increase response—not to mention clearing inboxes for the uninterested. 

Clarify and Adapt to Standard Response Times

Eighty percent of the participants in the UNC survey said typically expect readers to respond to “important” outside emails within four hours or less; 24 percent expect a response within an hour or less.

What’s the expected response time in the culture of the team you’re serving? Four hours? Twenty-four hours? Should you adapt to it? Are there exceptions to these standards? If so, what? If you don’t know, find out from the organizational leader. (If you are the leader, communicate that standard to your team.) Protect your organizational brand and your personal brand by living up to the expectations.

Slow responses suggest many things—most of them negative.

  • You’re overwhelmed and can’t keep up with the pace.
  • You’re puzzled by the decision or action required.
  • Your system of handling daily inquiries is ineffective.
  • You have a staffing problem.
  • The situation, decision, or project is unimportant to you.
  • You need to gather more information or input before replying.
  • You need time to deliberate before responding.

Can you routinely afford to be considered the bottleneck?

Email can be an enormous time saver–unless poor communication practices diminish its benefits and create an untamed monster. To tame the beast and reclaim your time, send fewer but better emails to engage team members to act on the essential.

Learn more ways to tame the email monster in Faster, Fewer, Better Emails: Manage the Volume, Reduce the Stress, Love the Results. Click here for details.

How would Dianna’s advice–send fewer but better emails–make a difference in your world? Share your comments here.

Filed Under: Business Writing Tagged With: better business writing, Booher Research Institute, business email communication, business writing, Dianna Booher, email overwhelm, email response time, fewer emails, nonfiction book editor, productivity drain, save time

3 Mistakes People Make in Writing Customers

August 21, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

By Dianna Booher (used with permission)

In today’s world, we work, live, and die by email. Okay, I exaggerate. But it’s hard to get through a week without weeding your way through an overflowing inbox. How do you make your emails stand out—positively rather than negatively—from competitors?

For starters, correct these problems…

3 Common Email Mistakes

Vague Subject Lines

Subject lines should be a condensed version of your message and the action you want. They should be informative, not mysterious—unless you’re an email marketer. And even then, marketers often find that vague headlines don’t always intrigue buyers.

A quick scan of a week’s inbox reveals subject lines like these:

A Quick Question (About what?)

Following Up (On what?)

Last-Minute Details (Is the reader asking for them or giving them?)

Can you imagine reading newspaper headlines as vague as these: “Stock Market.” “Taxes.” “Blizzard Conditions.” You wouldn’t know where to begin reading. Unless you’re a novelist—a mystery writer at that!—turn your subject lines into informative headlines.

Subject lines should be specific, useful, brief:

How to Register for the Upcoming RW Conference & Expo

New Dates for Denver New Product Orientation: Aug 12-13

Stopping Work on FTD Coding: Glitch in Step 7

Available Friday for Call About Licensing Extension?

Unclear Actions and Timeframes

Don’t hint or imply. State exactly what you want the reader to do and when. You can soften a request by stating the action as a question or by adding a courtesy word. For example: “Would you please send me your feedback on the demo equipment by Friday, May 6?” Such a statement sounds friendly, yet still sets expectations.

Never equate courtesy with vagueness. Phrases such as “at your earliest convenience” or “as soon as possible” simply leave your reader guessing. You can be both pleasant and precise.

Openings That Close Doors

In the classic movie Jerry Maguire, Tom Cruise barges into his home after an argument and long separation from his wife, starts an explanation meant as an apology, and makes a romantic plea: “You complete me…  You…”

She interrupts, “You had me at hello.”

In case you don’t recall the movie plot, let me just say the similarity to email greetings stops there:  Your email readers are not in love with you. (Okay, maybe your family members love you. Possibly a few favorite customers love you.) But even if emailing best friends, chances are they already have an overflowing inbox and may not want another email from you.

So your email greetings should warm clients and prospects up—not put them off.

Another thing about greetings: Stand out by “mixing It up.” My colleague Bill Lampton has mastered this principle well. Every email from him sounds as though he has just walked into my office with a fresh comment of the morning. Here are some recent greetings from his emails:

Dianna, hi—

Very good, Dianna. The next thing….

How about Tuesday, Dianna?

Good morning, Dianna!

For sure, Dianna…  Mid- to late-May fits my schedule…

I totally agree, Dianna, about the need to …

See how these greetings pull you right into the email as if we’re in a relationship and the conversation is just continuing?

That’s exactly the feeling you want your customers to have as they see your email in the preview window—that they’re in an ongoing relationship with you and should respond as if face to face.

So how to break through the email barrier and get quicker responses? Be specific. Say it in the subject line. Make sure your greeting warms buyers up—not puts them off.

email mistakesLearn more ways to improve your email communication in Faster, Fewer, Better Emails: Manage the Volume, Reduce the Stress, Love the Results by Dianna Booher. Click here for details.

 

Filed Under: Business Writing, Writing Tips Tagged With: better emails, better writing, Dianna Booher, email mistakes, faster, fewer, nonfiction book editor professionals, write better emails

5 Writing Questions to Ask Before Saying “I’m Done”

July 22, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

by Barbara McNichol

ask writing questionsSuppose you’re composing a sensitive email, article, or letter—one that’s extremely important in your world. But the message must be as clear and concise as possible.

Ask these five writing questions and follow the examples. From there, make changes that will immediately improve your prose and ensure you’ve written what you meant to write.

  1. Have you put in filler words that don’t add meaning to your sentence? E.g., Starting a sentence with “there are” or “here is” or a variation. “Here are excellent points to consider” becomes “Consider these points.” More direct!
  2. Can you spot and eliminate extraneous phrases? Omit “the fact of the matter is…” or “it’s important to remember that…” or “it’s all about…” Like filler words, they take up space without adding meaning.
  3. Where can you use noun modifiers to be more concise? E.g., “Tips on writing” becomes “Writing tips” and “Details regarding the conference” becomes “conference details.”
  4. How can you streamline sentences without changing the meaning? Look for “who” and “which” phrases. E.g., “Dee, who is our new manager, just had surgery” becomes “Our new manager, Dee, just had surgery.” “Our report, which we finished, is on your desk” becomes “We put our finished report on your desk.” Bonus: It uses an active verb.
  5. How can you use commas sparingly but also when needed to clarify the meaning of your sentences? E.g., “You can overlook punctuation rules and people will have trouble reading your writing and your ideas will get lost.” Without a comma after rules, this can be misread to say: “You can overlook punctuation rules and people…” That’s why you need the comma after rules. Even clearer would be: “If you overlook punctuation rules, people will have trouble reading your words, and your ideas will get lost.”

What writing questions would you add to these five that would help hone your writing to perfection before saying, “I’m done”? Note them in the comments section.

Filed Under: Writing Tips Tagged With: #betterwriting #businesswriting, better writer, company writing, extraneous writing, filler words, How to become a better writer, nonfiction book editor, streamline writing, use commas, Whack Wordiness, writing questions, writing workshop

“If I Were (Was) a Rich Man …”

May 28, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

by Barbara McNichol

The play Fiddler on the Roof recently came through my city, and my friend kept singing her dad’s favorite song from that hit: “If I Were a Rich Man.” My comment? “I’m glad the lyricist got the grammar right!”

Why is the use of “were” (not “was”) correct in this song title and similar phrases? Consider the conditional meaning associated with using an “if” clause. In this case, the lyrics “if I were a rich man” reflect a wishful condition, not a true statement.

You may recall how Tevye, the character in Fiddler on the Roof who sang this song, lamented his lowly position as a milkman and wondered what wealth would bring to his life.

If at one time he had been rich, he could factually say, “When I was a rich man.” But in the context of Fiddler on the Roof, he could only hope to be rich.

What about the song “If I Were a Carpenter”? Here, the lyricist correctly uses “were” to depict a hope or dream, not a current fact.

When It’s Correct to Use “Was”

So when would you use “was” (not “were”) in an “if” clause? When it introduces an indirect question or statement of fact. Examples:

  • The boss asked if I was (not “were”) finished with the report. This factual statement is based on what’s true or possible, not something hypothetical.
  • If he was (not “were”) guilty, he would have remained silent. This states a fact that’s likely true, not something conditional.

In the statements you write, remember to use “were” when the situation calls for being conditional, hypothetical, or wishful. And like Tevye, that’s how you can make a plea for the wealth you wish for!

***

Filed Under: Business Writing Tagged With: "were" vs. "was", #betterwriting #businesswriting, correct use of "if", Fiddler on the Roof, nonfiction book editor, subjunctive clause

Be a Better Writer–STOP Using “Start” So Much

April 30, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

by Barbara McNichol

Stop using the word Start

Pop Quiz

To be a better writer, when should you stop using the word start?

Answer

Now. Good writing includes the ability to craft strong, clear statements. Extraneous words and phrases water down communications. An outstanding example of this is the overuse of the words “start” and “begin.”

Look at these examples of creating stronger statements by going straight to the key action verb rather than “beginning” to go for it.

Example 1: Slowly begin to approach your teammate with your idea.

Better: Slowly approach your teammate with your idea.

Example 2: Start making an agenda for the meeting.

Better: Make an agenda for the meeting.

True confession time: Do you ever overuse “start” and “begin”? Please don’t start!

I hope this tiny Pop Quiz gave you a BIG idea for tightening your writing. If that was helpful, there is more.

What if you had a program that could guarantee you would become a better writer, making you a more valuable, promotion-worthy professional?

Even if you’re doing well in your job, you can have more within your reach.

The Word Trippers Tips ADVANTAGE Program does all that—and for less than the cost of a night on the town.

Becoming a better writer doesn’t just happen. I challenge you to …

CHECK OUT WORD TRIPPERS TIPS.

From tennis nut to word nerd and successful book editor, Barbara McNichol has built a career around her love of the English language. She can show you how great writing skills can help you get hired … win promotions … and build better working relationships. Reach her at editor@barbaramcnichol.com

Filed Under: Business Writing Tagged With: #betterwriter, be a better writer, better writer, business professionals, professional book editing, Writing Tips

Word Clutter Makes Me Feel like I’m Swimming in Jell-O

April 25, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

by Barbara McNichol

Reading through a book or report or email with lots of word clutter makes me feel like I’m swimming in Jell-O. My mind goes into slow motion. I lose attention. I start thinking about picking dead leaves off plants.

I’m sure you know what I mean by “word clutter.” It’s those long-winded phrases that the writer didn’t take the time to pare down.

Well, I have a magic trick for cutting out dead words and leaving my plants for another day.

Word Clutter Pop Quiz

What is the #1 way to make sentences less verbose and more direct?

Answer: Change long noun phrases to short verbs.

Consider the differences in these 3 examples:

  1. “They remain in contradiction with themselves” vs. “They contradict themselves.” (“Contradiction” is the noun; “contradict” is the verb.)
  2. “He made an acknowledgement of her success” vs. “He acknowledged her success.” (“Acknowledgement” is the noun; “acknowledged” is the verb.)
  3. “She initiated an implementation of the plan.” vs. “She implemented the plan.” (“Implementation” is the noun; “implemented” is the verb.)

See how less wordy and more direct the second version is in each sentence?

And Here’s Another Cagey Trick

If you’re not sure whether you can turn a long-winded noun into an active, lively verb, a dead giveaway is nouns ending in “ion” and “ment.” Notice in these examples the words contradiction, acknowledgement, and implementation. All those nouns have been successfully turned into shorter, more action-oriented verbs.

So the next time you edit your own work, use this magic trick and add more BAM! to your writing.

What writing tricks do you use to reduce word clutter?

Filed Under: Writing Tips Tagged With: #betterwriting, better writing, book writing tips, editing tips, long-windedness, magic writing trick, word clutter

Why Care About Your Writing Voice and How Can You Improve It?

April 18, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

By Barbara McNichol

Why care about your writing voice?

 

I agonize over how to help authors, business professionals, and WordShop students use their writing voice in interesting, meaningful ways.

Good writing requires more than just grammar and spelling. It’s style, catching someone’s attention, and making readers understand the conviction behind the words.

In my experience, one writing technique stands above all others…it adds power and memorability, and it makes writing good reading. Read on!

short verbs

Pop Quiz

You’ve likely heard that people prefer the active voice over the passive. But do you know why?

 

Answer

Writing in the active writing voice is powerful and dynamic. It catches and holds the reader’s attention far better than passive statements. The passive writing voice is a little “weasley.” It hides responsibility for action, and it can be ambiguous, confusing, and boring.

Furthermore,

  • The active voice conveys ideas quickly and directly.
  • The active voice clearly spells out the action and who is doing it.
  • The active voice frequently requires fewer words than passive sentences—helpful when space is limited.

Which is Which?

In a sentence written in the active voice, the subject of the sentence performs the action. In a sentence written in the passive voice, the subject receives the action.

Examples:

  • Active – I created Word Trippers Tips ADVANTAGE Program and I guarantee it will make you a better writer.
  • Passive – The Word Trippers Tips ADVANTAGE Program was created to make you a better writer.

It’s True. My Word Trippers Tips ADVANTAGE Program will absolutely make you a better writer.

You’ll find nothing else like this program. It’s easy. Fun. And available for less than the price of a new outfit. (And think how many new outfits you can buy with a higher-paying job because you wrote a powerful résumé and cover letter.)

Not a book … not a course … this program takes almost no time every week to absorb.

LEARN MORE HERE.

Filed Under: Business Writing Tagged With: #betterwriting #businesswriting, active vs. passive voice, conviction behind words, hold reader's attention, improve writing, nonfiction book editor professionals, writing voice

More Puns for April Fools Day

March 14, 2019 by Barbara McNichol Leave a Comment

punsWith April Fools Day approaching, tickle your funny bone with these puns to share with friends. These came from Todd Hunt:

1) Acupuncture is a jab well done.

2) If a clock is hungry does it go back four seconds?

3) Without geometry, life is pointless.

4) Corduroy pillows are making headlines.

5) I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words. (Barbara’s favorite)

These came from a faithful reader of Add Power to Your Pen:

  • No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
  • Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
  • Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  • A backward poet writes inverse.
  • If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you’d be in Seine.

OK – your turn. Write your best/worst puns in the comments!

Filed Under: Compelling Special Tagged With: editor nonfiction books, figures of speech, humor writing, professional book editor, puns, Todd Hunt

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